Talking With Your Doctor

Why Don't Doctors Ask About Sex?

• Lack of knowledge/training
• Embarrassment
• Ageism (“Seniors don’t think about sex”)
• Time Constraints
• Coverage/payment concerns

According to the AARP:  “Sexual health is a marker of overall health.” 

Why Don't Patients Ask About Sex?

• Lack of knowledge
• Embarrassment/Fear of judgement
• Social/familial/cultural Norms
• Fear of “betraying” your partner’s privacy
• Intimidation (“Power” differential)
• Coverage/payment concerns

Questions to Ask Your Doctor

• What are the side effects of this medication (or condition/procedure), and how might it affect me sexually?
• What can we do about my... (erectile dysfunction, vaginal dryness or pain, low libido, urinary incontinence…)? (It’s OK if this lead to a specialist referral.)
• I don’t understand what that means, can you explain it?
• What’s your opinion about why this is happening? What is my prognosis?
• Can you write that on my office visit summary/discharge note?

Tips:

• Write your questions (and your symptoms) down on a notecard
• Keep a current list of your meds on your cellphone (ask your kids if you don’t know how).
• It may be easier to write your questions in the online patient portal of your doctor’s office.

KEY TAKEAWAY: If your doctor won’t talk with you about sex or answer your questions about anything (“I don’t know but I’ll find out,” is an acceptable response) ...find a new doctor!

Questions? Comments? Let's Talk!

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